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Discomfort and How to Handle It

June 5th, 2009

I believe that our lives here on earth are one enormous learning situation.  I have seen the lessons zoom in front of me time, after time, after time until I finally get it.  Many lessons come in the form of discomfort.  

 
The first time I was consciously aware that there was discomfort in my life came long after it had been happening for quite a while.  It’s like having a veil torn away from your face and thinking “Oh dear!  This has made me uncomfortable for a long time and I don’t want this experience any more.”  I have to jokingly say that I think my own wisdom heaves a sigh of relief when I finally get it.  And because I missed all the previous clues, who knows how long they’d been there.  That doesn’t matter.  What does matter is that I finally got it.

 
So when you finally get in touch with your “I am uncomfortable” messages, what do you do about them and why are they there?  I have learned that the substance of life is goodness itself and when we deviate from this goodness in any fashion, the messages of discomfort begin.  This is the why of discomfort being there. It’s like an engine on a train with one wheel off the track – very uncomfortable!  You have to keep all four wheels lined up and moving forward for your life’s engine.
We now know why we become uncomfortable – because we have deviated from life’s intrinsic goodness in one form or another.  This is done mainly by thinking un-good thoughts.  Those thoughts come in forms like the following:

 
I can never attract a good, decent man.
My girlfriends always leave me.
I never have enough money.
I’m not smart enough.
My body is too fat.
I hate this job and my boss.
The world is an unhappy place. 


 

If life’s substance is goodness itself, that goodness would be the underlying, although invisible, substance behind everything.  If the individuals who spoke the thoughts above knew this truth, they’d have said instead:

 
A good decent man is on his way into my life.
My girlfriends all love me and enjoy satisfying relationship with me.
I’ve always got enough money.  It shows up somehow, someway.
I’m as smart as anyone and I work to achieve both knowledge and understanding daily.
My body has a perfectly proportionate shape.
I worked to find a job I can love and a boss I can respect.
My world is a happy, harmonious place.
 

How can you get from discomfort to comfort? Use the discomfort as a bright red flag.  “Oh boy!  Here’s another area I can work on and Be the Change! My mind is point out to me precisely what makes me uncomfortable so I can do something about it and return to the goodness that is my natural inheritance and my natural state.”   As with everything of value, the effort to achieve it is so worthwhile and I happen to believe that you are the right person for this job!  You have my good wishes for your success.

~Maria

Latest Newspaper Article!

June 1st, 2009

Hello Everyone,

 

Please check out my latest article!  Here is the link…  http://www.albaladonline.com/html/story.php?sid=64276

 

~Maria

Do We Know Who We Are?

May 29th, 2009

Mahatma Gandhi said “I want freedom for the full expression of my personality.”  I began to think about that idea and it brought up another similar quotation that had hung for a full year on the board of my sixth grade classroom:  “Personality is who people think you are; character is what God knows you are.” I think that whether you like the word personality or you like the word character, whatever one you choose to define yourself, it is important to accomplish that task.

 
We can know who we are by looking at our thinking, our speaking and our actions.  Let’s look at those one at a time.

 
To look at what you are thinking, I’d like to remind you about the little voice of your conscious that has been in there watching all along.  Know how that little voice talks to you and makes comments to you that you don’t dare to say out loud?  Yes, that little voice.  You have already been going within yourself much of your life.  It’s simply about elevating those internal conversations to a position of greater authority in your life and honoring what you hear or see yourself saying inside your own mind. 

 
One of the keenest skills I’ve noticed in Asian cultures is that keen ability to observe and this is what I’d recommend that  you foster within yourself.  In order to do that, you’d more than likely have to speak less out loud unless you are capable of doing two things simultaneously. You may discover great wisdom as you observe.  You may also discover things that can be improved.  Either way, you will be well served to observe what you are thinking, because, as Shakespeare said “There is nothing either good or bad but thinking makes it so.” You can Know who you are if  you observe yourself thinking.

 
To observe yourself speaking requires a bit more skill, because you do have to be talking and observing at the same time.  Your thinking always precedes your speaking and I believe you should start at the beginning to observe what you think before you can accomplish this part.  Communicating our thoughts and ideas places us the highest on the food chain, so this ability should be revered as one of our capabilities. You want to acquire a way to speak fluidly, naturally and comfortably.  If you can slow down while you are speaking and only say the most critical parts, your observation will benefit you well. 

 
Some questions you might ask yourself while speaking are:  Are these words essential? Have I interrupted someone else’s words?  Will what I am saying hurt someone? Will my words have a positive impact?  Are my words of value to my listener?  Am I articulating well?  Is my tone appropriate? Do my words match what is really in my heart?  Do my words permit me to remain in integrity with my true, core beliefs? Does the face of my listener reflect his interest or is he disinterested? What else remains when I quit speaking?  Do I owe someone an apology? Remember: “It is better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool than to open it and remove all doubt.” ~~Samuel Clemens (Mark Twain) You can Know who you are is you observe yourself speaking.

 
Watching your actions is the last step toward self-knowledge.  Why do you do the things you do?  What motivates you?  Where did  you unfold your skills?  Do you have enough skills to do a thing well?  Each of us has at least one talent to do at least one thing really well.  Do you know what that is for you?  If you observe your actions keenly and objectively, you can discover that. Just doing that one thing well is a grand way to develop your identity.  

 
Each of us has one unique gift.  Beethoven was gifted musically. Fairuz was gifted with a magnificent voice. Einstein was gifted scientifically.   Khalil Gibran was gifted poetically. If you could picture your own funeral, what gift would others say you had?  Learn to observe your actions from that perspective.

 
Pretend you are a detective who follows you around.  What conclusions would he come to just by watching you?  This is the kind of objectivity you need to know who you are. You might see strengths; you might see weaknesses.  Whatever you see, observing your actions objectively will help you know who you are.  

 
Your thinking, your speaking and  your actions are foundational knowledge that has to be set in place before you can Be the Change in your life to create more health, wealth, success, and happiness.  I know you can do it.

~ Maria

Radio Show Tomorrow at 12:00 pm!

May 26th, 2009

Just a reminder about the radio show tomorrow!  Thanks for listening!

Program Name: KIFAK EL YOM
Presented By: maria khalife
Time: 12:00 – 01:00 Beirut Time

Hello Everyone,

I just wanted to let you all know that I will be on the radio show KIFAK EL YOM, Wednesday at 12:00pm!  Tune in!

Here is LINK:  http://www.sawtelghad.com/

Radio Show Wednesday! Check it out!

May 19th, 2009

Program Name: KIFAK EL YOM
Presented By: maria khalife
Time: 12:00 – 01:00 Beirut Time

Hello Everyone,

I just wanted to let you all know that I will be on the radio show KIFAK EL YOM, Wednesday at 12:00pm!  Tune in!

Here is LINK:  http://www.sawtelghad.com/